Ben
I misread the level of the answer you are looking for, and doubt if I can provide it. Talking with a physicist friend about this I caught the ‘eye-rolling’ response which usually means the answer is out of my league. I am reminded of Richard Feynman’s response ‘I can’t explain it in terms you are familiar with, because I don’t understand it in terms you are familiar with.‘
I have accepted that there are deeper aspects of both particle physics and cosmology that I do not have enough background to really understand, and I am unwilling to invest probably several years of study to achieve that level.